What YouTube Comments Really Mean

– What up, everyone? It's your girl, Superwoman And if you're watching this video, one of two things probably happened

Number one You enjoy my videos and you're excited to watch this one Number two You clicked on that and then ended up here and now you're watching one of my videos for the first time Hi! Welcome

My name is Lilly, and I look forward to your positive comment or your hate comment Either way, thanks for your time and effort Speaking of comments, I get a lot of them In fact, in my lifetime, I've gotten three million seven hundred and forty six — how do you even say that number? 3,746,449 comments, wowzers! To give you some context, that's about half as many relationships I've failed in [laughs sarcastically] So having said that, I think I'm qualified to tell you what YouTube comments really mean

"First!" I think I'm the first person to watch this video, when in reality, I'm probably like the 70th person to watch this video, I just haven't refreshed my screen yet In a few seconds, when I do, all of my dreams will be crushed "Second!" Yo, I have no idea what this video is about, but I have to hurry up and comment 'Second' because there is no way I'm going to be third "Everyone who comments 'First' is so dumb, like do you want a cookie?" I'm so pissed I didn't get first comment! "Go back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich" I have never had a girlfriend and I genuinely make poor life choices

For example, right now I'm wearing socks with my Crocs There's also a stain on my shirt "You're a terrorist" My brain is controlled by the media, and I blindly accept information Now, I'd love to stay and chat, but I have to forward this scary email to 70 people in the next seven minutes or a ghost is going to kill me

"Wait, how are there 1000 likes but only 700 views?" This is my first time on the Internet and I can't believe I've already found a glitch on YouTube Honestly, I thought the Internet was smart Better call Google and tell them from my Motorola flip phone "Gay" I don't know how to use words properly, and therefore, I'm suggesting that this video enjoys sexual intercourse with videos of the same sex

"I love this video Also, I make my own videos and I would really love if you gave me a chance and checked them out" Okay I'm going to be real, I didn't really watch this video Okay, but I'm just going to copy and paste the same comment under a bunch of YouTube videos because I'm an entrepreneur and I want views Also, I'm going to make this comment bold

"I ship them so badly" Okay I see two people in the same video that may or may not be compatible Okay, whatever Okay, fine

They're brother and sister Whatever But the idea of them taking cute Instagram pictures together and having babies excites me Therefore, I feel qualified to make their life decisions So, get married

Don't be selfish "I want to (bleep) the (bleep) out of you" Last night, I texted a girl and asked her to Netflix and chill Then, she came over and we just Netflixed and chilled! We watched The Notebook And I'm really frustrated about it

"You're not funny and you suck and I hate you and you're dumb and you're ugly" I like run-on sentences Also, I wish they would invent this button on my Internet window that like, closed it, you know, so I didn't have to, like, watch these videos against my will "I can totally relate This happens to me all the time

" Oh my god, this Internet stranger understands me better than anyone else in my life Okay, I need to be their friend immediately "I wasn't particularly fond of this video, because of XYZ" I'm an adult who has an opinion Chances are I dress well and when I invite people to my birthday, they come

"Dumb" I'm that person that responds to text messages with 'K' "Shut up" I don't understand how comments work Also, I'm that person that's driving and has to turn down the volume because I'm trying to read a street sign

"Go die" If Mufasa and The Joker had a baby, it would be me Having said that, I truly appreciate all the comments, especially the supportive ones, which is why I'm going to take some time right now and respond to as many as I can So take a second, and comment below Do it

Do it Do it Do it Do it Do it

Do it I mean if you want It's really your choice And before you leave and carry on with your life, one second Yo, have you downloaded my app yet? Yo, hold up

Download my Unicorn Island app It is free for iPhone and Android, and I'm going to convince you why for the following reasons Number one There's an awesomesauce game in the app called Flappy Unicorn and every week I'm going to give a shoutout to whoever has a high score Shoutouts to SyRoCKs2908 for a score of 160 and if I didn't say your username correctly, then leave a hate comment

Number two There's something called Fan Art Friday where if you post your fan art in the app, I will print someone's fan art on a t-shirt and wear it in a video Number three It's free! Why the 'F' would you not? All the links to download the app are in the description or you can click the little 'I' in the corner of your screen Look at all the fancy technology! If you enjoyed this video, make sure you give a big thumbs up You can check out my last video right there

It's called "Why I Am A Cheap Person" If you're on your phone and your annotations don't work, I'll put the link in the description You can also check out my latest vlog right there I do those every single day, so make sure you subscribe to that second channel, and make sure you subscribe because I make new videos every Monday and Thursday, and I'd love for you to be there I hope you're happy and chillin' and cool and, okay

Well, I am Superwoman That is a wrap! [beatboxes]

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