What Last Minute Christmas Shopping Is Really Like (ft. Hilary Duff)

(hooves galloping) (fun light music) – Why do we do this every year? – Because we're stupid people – I told myself that I was gonna start my Christmas shopping on December 1st and yet here I am again on Christmas Eve

– Yeah You know what my niece said? She wants a Lightning McQueen car She said if she doesn't get one she's never taking a selfie with me again (scoffs) My Instagram can't handle that kinda loss – You know what, my son wants that too

And he said if he didn't get one, he's gonna run away The doors are all child locked but I mean, he could figure it out – God dammit, Disney Everything they create turns into a monster Oh, not everything

– Mm-hmm – Selena Gomez's pretty cool – Alright, alright Let's just park, alright? – Yeah – Get in and out

– Mm-hmm – Just quick, efficient – Mm-hmm – We got this – And by the way, we don't even need to stress

Can we just take a moment to remember what Christmas is actually about? Love – Uh-huh – Right? Like giving – Mmm – Peace

– Mm-hmm (car horn beeps) – Hey, idiot box! What the F are you doing? – Hello? Get outta my way! This is my spot! – Yeah, you can't just claim a spot, moron! – Move it! – Hey punk, unless you're King Julien from Madagascar, you cannot talk to me like that, ya punk! – Lemme pull out! – You have enough room, ya turd! – Let her pull out! – Yeah, let her do what your dad shoulda done, you crappy driver! – You're an accident who's about to cause an accident! (car revving) (car horn beeps) – Hurry up, doofus! – Ugh! Listen, I'm trying to park, okay, but this girl keeps backin' it up on me! – Yeah, we're like Drake in a Rihanna music video! – My gay son is straighter than your parking job! – Okay, honestly, listen I'm holding a mistletoe above my butt right now, okay? Kiss it Kiss it! (sighs) – Love – Mm-hmm

– Giving – Mm-hmm – Peace – [Aggressive Driver] I would love to give you girls a piece of my fist! – I'm just gonna go up there Hi! Yeah, excuse me, ma'am

I'm looking for a perfume for my sister, something kinda sweet – Lady, lady, lady! Do you have anymore Dora the Explorer backpacks? – Mom, I want Dora now! – I told you to be quiet If you wanna explore so badly, I'll buy a damn atlas! – I'm so sorry, ma'am, we're actually all sold out right now – No, no You don't understand, I need Dora

You need to find me a Dora backpack right now! (screams) – Oh – Oh, okay Yeah, Hilary take these pliers, okay, and tie my tubes right now (scoffs) – [Man] Excuse me, miss My wife is going to kill me if I don't buy her a gift

Can you please take my money and save my marriage? – [Sales Lady] Okay – Take all my money, please – This is crazy Grab whatever you can – Okay

– There, there's a dollar bin – You know, the stuff in the dollar bin is always so weird and crappy and lame What the F? – OMG, I just found the perfect present for your dad! – Oh my God, he's gonna love that – Oh, this is totally him, right? – It's perfect He's never gonna take it off

Wait, how do you know so much about my dad? – Oh, he DMs me a lot on Instagram – Hello, Hilary Best of luck Hashtag, I'm with her – Oh

– Well, there's nothing else here Hello, supply and demand Where's the supply? – I know, right? Like, you call this consumerism? – We have to go to another store Listen, whatever you do, don't breathe when we walk by Cinnabon You know we won't be able to resist it and we're out of time

– Alright, okay I'll hold my breath (loud breath) (bells ringing) Oh crap, crap Avoid eye contact, keep walking – Oh God

Oh, he's staring into my soul! – Oh, sorry! Me no English! – The world can't change if you can't spare some change – Pretend you're on the phone, okay? Just look the other way – Oh, it burns, it burns! You know what, I'm sorry I don't have any change – There's an ATM right across the street

– What, an ATM? No, we don't have time for that I'm freaking out, okay? The mall closes in 20 minutes – Okay, Lilly, just calm down – No, no, I can't calm down I shouldn't even be here! I'm not even Christian! I don't even know what a manger is! (bell rings) – Charity brings clarity

– Lilly, take a deep breath, okay? – Yeah Oh, no – Can we get two Cinnabons, please? – Yeah With extra frosting I mean, it's okay if you charge us extra

I have spare change (fun light music) – I can't find anything on my list We're too late – Me neither (sighs) Hillary

Look (holy music) (gasps) It's mine – Lilly, stand down – Listen, okay? My niece is adorable – Okay, I pushed my son through my vagina

– Oh, okay, big deal Stop being such a manger, okay? (laughs) – Wow, okay You really don't know English I'm taking this (gasps) – I'm sorry, but someone just called to put this on hold

– Wait, it's been taken? – They're actually on the phone right now – Yeah I don't know who you are, okay? I don't know what you want If you're looking for ransom, I can tell you that I don't have money But what I do have are a very particular set of skills

If you let Lightning McQueen go, that'll be the end But if you don't, I will look for you I will find you and I will kill you (loud smash) (whistles) (phone rings) Hey, mom – Oi, Lilly

What are you doing? – I'm wrapping Sana's gift – Oh, really? She going to be so happy But listen, I want to ask you Is Hilary still coming to Christmas dinner with you? I want to buy food – No

Hilary and I aren't friends anymore – What? You girls so dumb, always ka-ka-ka-ka Shut up, okay? Listen, what did you buy Sana anyways, huh? – Are you ready for this? The toy she's been begging for, Lightning McQueen – Huh? She don't like Lightning McQueen no more, she like Moana now! (loud crash) Oi, Lilly! Lilly, hello? Siri? Hello, Siri? – What up, everyone? It's your girl, Superwoman, and – Hilary Duff – Make sure you check out the latest season of Younger Links are in the description My last collaboration's right over there

Bloopers and BTS right over there Make sure you subscribe 'cause I make new videos every Monday and Thursday You wanna try my outro? – I do – One love – One love

– Superwoman – Superwoman – That is a wrap – Blah-la-oop! And zoop! – Bye! – I like that, blah-la-oop! That's a new thing right there, boom!

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