Stages of FOMO

– [Lilly] What up everyone? It's your boy, Scarbro! (horse neighs) What up everyone? It's your girl, Superwoman! FOMO, the fear of missing out A

KA all your friends are out but you're stuck at home and you're 100% sure they're gonna see a double rainbow without you Listen, we all go through it, it happens to the best of us In fact, that's the reason I almost failed English class

Yeah, I didn't wanna stay home and study Also, you know what, no, that's untruly I also just think English are very difficult Stages of FOMO, get ready to relate in a very real way not when your mom just has a brown guy over and is like, this is uncle now And you're like, since when? But relate in a very, like real, like you could draw the family tree

You know the relationships Get ready to relate Stage one, discovery When you first realize that you might be missing out on something epic, it feels like a dagger has gone through your heart It's so painful, it's like bang! Lightning bolt, okay? Just like Harry Potter forehead scar through your cardiovascular system, why? It sucks

Oh my gosh, she's pregnant? What beach is this? Oh, yum that looks good Oh, hello What a cute puppy Pool party? Let me get this straight You're telling me that right now, in this moment, other people are doing things without me and still having fun? Which leads to stage two, panic

Now the song zero to a hundred real quick, real effin' quick, was written for me in this stage because all chill has left the building I basically do everything I possibly can to blow up the situation, I'm talking over-exaggerating, defense mechanisms, excuses, anger, justifications, all the things It's like every unhealthy thing I can do with the thoughts in my brain, I am doing And it's like being possessed by irrational thoughts and not even Dr Phil can perform the exorcism

Swimming pools have so many germs, ew! Gross, I'm so glad I wasn't invited Have fun swimming in people's pee I hope they ate asparagus Why wouldn't they invite me? Oh my God, am I annoying? Is this something everyone else knows that I don't know? Am I the annoying one? Oh my God, I'm the annoying one I have no friends

No one likes me, I should just move away SPF flirty, how's that supposed to protect you from the sun? Joke's on you idiots, you're so dumb, they're so dumb I'm all over the place Just like, oh okay, you're having fun without me, that's okay, I don't mind, but also I have a lot of feelings and maybe we should do a blood pact and then never speak again Which leads to stage three, avoidance

Now after losing my goddamn mind, I hit a point where I'm like, you know what, actually eff this, everything is fine I'm actually, in fact, too good for the situation This is actually exactly what I would've wanted Of course, this is 100% not true and completely a defense mechanism but I'm really good at pretending Actually, you know what, no, no

You know what, this is actually good I need to disconnect from technology Yeah, spend a little alone time Totally, I need to focus on me How to focus on me

Stage four, desperation Why aren't I included, why aren't I invited? I need an invitation I'm about to poke strangers on Facebook I'm about to try to look for friendship on Tinder I'm about to legally change my name to Phoebe, just so I can say that once upon a time I had friends

(mumbles "Friends" theme song) You're girl is gettin' desperate I don't even know why I'm tripping I have so many amazing friends Like Kevin, oh my god, yes, Kevin's amazing (Kevin grunting) (phone ringing) – Oh hold on, hold on

– Hey, Kev, my man, what are you doing? – Oh my god, Lilly? Hi! Yeah, no, what am I doing? Nothin', you know, just slayin' a dragon, claimin' a castle – Huh, okay, yeah, cool, yeah do you wanna hang later tonight? – You're already here, my princess (kissing noises) – Okay, Kevin are you kissing the mannequin again? – What, no, no, I promise! (more kissing sounds) – Kevin You probably Like nah, no, no, no, don't worry, don't worry, I got mad friends, yeah I'm gonna go hang out with my friend right now, Jack Daniels I'm just kidding, I'm talking to my friend, Don

Julio Jk, jk, I'm talking with my friend Absolut Vodka Okay, this joke is gone Stage five, passive aggressiveness

See, I'm irritated but I'm also bottling it up, so now my emotions are just gonna seep out in the most petty way possible The goal here is simple, take you on a guilt trip but also pretend not to care Like, yo, why aren't I invited, but also whatever yo, I'm chill! So cool, but where's Lilly? Isn't she your friend, too? She's pretty LOL hi, LOL Your pool party looks so fun LOL haha! Hope you're well LOL

I just think it's funny how Which finally leads us to stage six, adulthood After you're doing being in high school and hitting puberty all over again, you decide, you know what, maybe I should handle this situation like a mature adult

So what do you do? You spend 45 minutes rehearsing dialogue so you can have a conversation head-on Hey, yeah, I just wanted to say that I'm a little hurt that you didn't invite me to your pool party I thought we were friends And that's when you find out the truth – [Girl Over Phone] What are you talking about? I did invite you, you didn't respond

– Oh – [Girl On Phone] Come over, we're partying all night! – Sounds like fun! But I can't, I'm busy Thanks anyways, though, miss you! (kissing noise) (crunching chips) This is nice And the truth is that you weren't gonna go regardless because you're anti-social, you're lazy, and there's probably traffic And that's the tea

Also wait, before we go to the end card, I mean I had to do this, this video's called "Stages of FOMO" Thank god we have great books like this one letting you know how to let go of FOMO How to Be a Bawse, still a thing If you didn't know and you're new to my videos, I did write a book and, like, it was a bestseller and I think it's really good and it's called How to Be a Bawse and you should get it, the link is in the description If you want, now you can go to the end card

Yo, I hope you liked this video because that's why I make them, I make them in hopes that you like them and you laugh because that's what I wanna do Last video right over there, second vlog channel, that make sure you check that out, you ain't got nothin' else to do, come on And make sure you subscribe, because I make new videos every Monday and Thursday One love, Superwoman, that is it, wrap and zoop!

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