If Life Were a Game Show

– But isn't it? (sparkling) (hooves clattering) Waddup everyone, it's your girl, Superwoman, and I don't watch much TV, but the times I do I ensure it's absolute trash Such as game shows

That I don't know about you, when I watch a game show, I am so invested, I am vicariously living through these contestants Yaaas Dad, win us a million dollars! Who's us? What? Like you mean that white man from Texas isn't my dad? Then who is? Stop, he's my dad, okay, don't get so technical That got me thinking, what if my life was like a game show? How dope would that be? I mean if you think about it, my life is already a cruel game, so you might as well make a show about it – Excuse me, can we get more bread? – So Lilly, we've been dating for three years now – I know right, almost as long as it's taken to get more bread

– Will you marry me? – [Host] Who wants to be married? – Is it yes, you'll marry me, no, we're over, not sure, or you'll say yes now, but no later on – I'd like to phone a friend (dramatic percussion) Hey Jessica, it's Lilly I need your help Sam is proposing to me right now

Should I say yes, no, not sure, or yes now but no later – [Jessica] Wait, didn't you say his hands were small? – I did, they look like puppet hands – Could you at least take her off speaker? – Shh, I only have ten seconds – [Jessica] Okay babe, say yes but then no – Got it, love you

Yes! (button dings) (applauding) – Are you kidding me? Lifelines in real life? Yes please I can't tell you how many times I've been in an awkward situation and I wish that I could phone a friend or family member Pulled over by a cop Uh, yeah sir could you hold on one second? (phone ringing) Yeah, hello lawyer friend? What are my rights again? Also should I lie to this cop right now? While making out (kissing noises) Hey sorry one second, one second

(phone ringing) Yeah hey BFF, how did you say to give a hickey again? Is it with my mouth or my eyes? At the auto shop Oh what's that Mr Mechanic sir? I need new wheels because my radio's not working? Yeah hold on one second (phone ringing) Yo Dad, I think this mechanic's lying to me right now Do I need new wheels? Just the sheer amount of times I've called my parents for stupid, If you have ever, I'ma tell you

You know what adulthood is? It is moving out and phoning your mom just like, (phone ringing) How do I make rice? (laughs) This video is turning into something else, but facts! I also feel like negative situations would be a lot more fun if life was a game show Like hey, this terrible thing is about to happen to you But, you have to find out what it is through this game! Yay! – Mom, why are you going through my phone? – Why you texting Sam? Who the bloody hell's Sam? Don't make me– – What? What are you gonna do? (lively game show music) – [Audience] Wheel of Torture! – Category is: How will your mother punish you? (screen dinging) (applauding) – I'd like to buy a vowel (screen dinging) I'd like to solve Beat me with a slipper

– Vanna? (screen dinging) Congratulations! (thudding) – Indian parents, I tell ya The game with no winners Yay! I looked kinda like a seal there (seal barking noise) Am I a seal? Also, making decisions would be a lot easier if life was a game show, because there's rules you have to abide by Right now, how do you make decisions? You have to analyze your thoughts, evaluate your emotions, make pros and cons lists, you know, Google and all that

Who has the time or the mental health for all of that? Not I So instead the game rules would help you make that decision – You know, I just don't like when you comment on other girls' pictures – Is it really that big a deal? (upbeat music) – [Audience] Big Deal or No Deal? (phone ringing) – Babe, that's the restaurant calling I made reservations and I really don't wanna be late today

Please, just take the offer (audience booing and commenting) – No deal Seven (latches clicking) (dramatic music) (audience sighs) You are so untrustworthy I want your Instagram password

You have small hands! – It's fool proof, I swear Okay, except for all those times with the games that don't make a big deal, but then I make a big deal anyways But besides that Date me Not to mention, I'd probably be a lot sharper and wittier if this was a game show

Constantly being tested like that? Yo, I would be able to get myself out of any situation – Oy! You see what time it is? – Sorry – Why you so bloody late? – [Audience] Family Fib! – Top fibs up on the board – My phone died I lost track of time

– Survey says, (dinging) – Your phone died, nobody else had phone or watch? – Uh, I got lost? – Show me I got lost (buzzing) Ooh – You got lost? On way from Jessica house? You go there everyday – There was traffic A really bad accident

(dinging) – [Audience] Traffic – Traffic – Oh – And I had car trouble (dinging) – [Audience] Car won't start

– Okay, be careful (dramatic music) – Sucker! Mom, that's right, I was on a date with Sam Who's yo daddy? Also wait, you know what I just realized? My dad's real name in real life is Sam Why would I name that boyfriend character Sam? Do I, is something wrong, do I have daddy issues? Like you mean that white man from Texas isn't my dad? Then who is? Nah, I'm good (sparkling) (popping) Yo wassup, you know the drill, it's not your first time here

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Just kidding Last video there, second vlog channel there, make sure you subscribe, I make new videos every Monday and Thursday, one love, Superwoman, that is a wrap and zoop!

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