How to Deal with Brown People (PART 2)

– Welcome to the Brown Bar (whimsical music) – So I recently starting dating a brown girl and her parents asked what I do for a living, I'm a teacher, but they want me to form my answer in terms of doctor, lawyer, engineer

– Just tell them you're an engineer – But I'm not – Are you not an engineer of education? – Uh, okay, I also have a summer job at Best Buy – Oh, so you're a computer engineer – No, I just sell them

– So you're a computer engineer – My phone isn't working properly It keeps glitching – Oh no, let's take a look Mmm, yeah, I see what's going on

Gimme a second Kanwer, can you help me with this? (rubbing hands together) Hi-nee There, should be good as new Somebody probably just cast an evil eye over it – Uber driver? – Transportation engineer

– How do I know if my brown friends celebrate Christmas? – Just ask them – Okay, Hannah, do you celebrate Christmas? – Tony, buddy, listen to me I already told you I'll accept a gift from you because I respect your religion I just won't buy anything for you because I don't really celebrate Christmas – So that's a no, then? – I didn't say that

– Then what are you saying? – I'm saying I'm a size eight and I really love Balenciaga's, because I really respect your religion – House cleaner? – Sanitary engineer – My boyfriend Dave got really upset that I don't like cricket – People are allowed to have different preferences, I guess – So isn't it just a boring version of baseball? – Security

– Cashier? – Finance engineer – So I'm working on a film, and I'm told it needs to be a little more diverse – Sounds like a good idea – Yeah, but there aren't any roles for doctors or cab drivers or anything – Well, what other roles are there? – Uh, let's see, there's a love interest

– Brown people can love – There's a student – Brown people do go to school – There's the best friend – As a brown person, I have personally experienced friendship

– Really? – Yes, brown people can play all of those roles What else is there? – Whoa, one's enough for now, all right? I still want people to be able to relate, but thank you – Okay, Hank Azaria – Gardener? – Photosynthesis engineer, huh? – I failed my math test and my parents are gonna kill me – Here's what you want to do

You go into your parents' room, you tell 'em you made a mistake Tell 'em you're pregnant You're on meth, and it was your boyfriend Kevin Jerome, even better, and then tell 'em, actually, you know what, I'm not sure who the father is That's why I'm going on Maury to publicly find out who the father is, and then hit 'em with the, just kidding! I only failed my math test, but you see how much worse things could be? – I came to this country to give better life to my kids and now, my son is making TikToks

– And eating beef Yes, you know, a lot of people come here to complain about their kids Why don't you take one of these brochures? You'll see that most kids are actually worse than yours – This boy has tattoos on his face! – My mom really wants me to be a vegetarian, but I really like KFC – Ah, that's okay

That's not real meat anyways – Every time I go to my health clinic, Dr Raghupathi's just prescribing me turmeric with water – And what's the problem? – It's not fixing anything – Have you tried ginger? – No, I need real medicine

– Okay, here's what you need You're gonna get some brandy, you're gonna warm it up, and you're gonna take shots of that You'll be as good as new You're welcome – My school doesn't have any colored people there except me and (sighs) I can't relate to anyone

– What do they talk about? – This one guy always talks about how Carol's annoying and cheap – What did Carol do? – She's lame and tells him what to do I mean, I heard them fighting on the phone this one time and he told her to, shut the F up and then he hung up – How long they been dating? – Carol's his mom – Oh

– Anyway, I gotta go My mom's waiting in the car I really gotta go, I'm sorry – So I'm a huge fan of the Simpsons, but I watched this documentary recently that said Apu is problematic now How should I feel? – I feel like you should watch Family Guy

– I'm dating a brown guy, but I'm Hindu and he's Christian – Your parents will come around – I'm Hindu, but he's Buddhist – Your parents will come around – I'm Hindu, but he's white

– Run away from home – Hi, so I'm dating this brown girl and she grew up kinda suppressed, you know, and I want to get it on but I want to be sensitive about sex and stuff, so what do you think I should do? – All right, let me tell you what not to do Don't read the Kama Sutra As it is an Indian text, we're not too fond of sharing that information with other people Matter of fact, I don't think we do it with each other

It's kind of like yoga You ever see an Indian person doing yoga? Not very much – My little boy is growing up too fast He wants to start making his own decisions He's talking to girls, which are bad influences

– Have you tried grounding him? – Yes, but he talks back to me, says I can't do that – Maybe try taking away his toys – I tried – Ma, can I have my phone back, please? My wife is probably calling me – See what I mean? – Yeah

– Hi! Thank you so much for watching this video I appreciate you taking the time, of all the other things you could be doing, to watch this video Give it a thumbs up if you liked it Check out all the people in the video Shout out to them

The links are in the description My last video over there My vlog channel there, and yo, make sure you subscribe because we're making videos on here One love, Lilly, that is a wrap, and zoop I have, one hand is holding the camera, so

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


*


This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.