5 Things Guys Do That Girls Love (ft. D-Trix)

– You should listen to me, yo I'm a relationship expert that's single

(Christmas bells) What up everyone, it's your girl, Superwoman, and I am not looking for a relationship right now I have no interest in putting my time or effort into another person, nor do I need another person to put energy into me, okay? Because that's what granola bars are for And even though I'm pretty solid on that decision, from time to time, a guy will do something and my heart will try to convince my brain to think differently So let me reveal to you the five things guys do that girls love, AKA, lifehacks for single men to get that Netflix and chill Number one, wear distinct cologne

Okay now, hold up, I'm sure you've heard that before It's not some unique thought It's not rocket science Let's be real We both live on thought catalog

But let me explain to you why this is so important You see, because women wear perfume, and perfume smells sweet, okay? Reminds you of flowers, fields, okay? Nice sunsets, okay, perfume is basically like Connor Franta's Instagram, okay? It's effin' beautiful In fact, the whole experience of wearing perfume is very sensual All commercials that advertise perfume are always like a girl touching herself with no real story line A great example is any Miley Cyrus music video

♫ I came in like a wrecking ball ♫ Perfume by Dior And although perfume smells great, it also smells kind of like, delicate, and fragile, and passive and submissive Like, straight up, if perfume were a person, I would imagine that person having to fight for their right to vote, and that's annoying I mean like, straight up, even I wanna ask a bottle of Chanel to go make me a sandwich

But cologne, on the other hand, no no no, cologne smells like confidence, okay? Like power Cologne smells like you just hit a three-pointer, won the game, and now Drake is gonna write a rap lyric about you ♫ Step curd with the shot, Boy! ♫ And that's hot So it's hard for a woman to be around you and ignore that scent of victory, okay? And chances are, if she's pissed at you, she'll still be captivated by the amazing scent of your cologne I saw you check her out! – No, I wasn't even looking at her

– I saw you! – (sighs) Lilly, I wasn't even looking at her – I saw you with my own eyes, Dom – Fine, okay, I'm sorry, alright? I'm sorry – Don't even touch me! Get away from me! – (sighs) Fine – Get over here! Just

– Uh, okay, I'm sorry – Don't touch me! Get, get away from me! – Ow, ow, that's my neck – You smell like a miracle, dammit! Not to mention, girls actually remember how guys smell True story, I can not tell you how many times I've hugged a guy and been like, "Oh, my God

"He smells like my ex" And then I'm like, "Finish him!" (fighting exhalations) What up t-shirt reference (laughing) JK, J

K No, but for real, that's the type of effed up brainwashing you need Number two, children Now let me make one thing clear I do not want kids right now

I have absolutely no desire to pop a human being out of my vajayjay, and then having to get my vajayjay all stitched up You know why? Because snitches get stitches, and my vajayjay didn't say a damn thing, okay? It's that simple And you know what? Maybe one day I will want kids, just like maybe one day I'll actually update my computer software and not click remind me tomorrow But today is not that day I mean, don't get me wrong

I love kids in small doses I mean, I love my nephews But I ain't trying to be a mom So then, why is it that when I see a man interacting with a child, suddenly my mind views him as the father to my hypothetical children? I swear to God, why does this happen? Is this just me? Because I feel like a man with a baby attached to him could be like a Pokemon character Straight up, just like, "I play Fatherhood

" And I'mma be over here like, "Ahh, Pika Pika!" It's effin' wizardry – Hey, sweetie, how are you? Oh my gosh, you're so adorable You know Uncle Dom loves you, right? – [Lilly] Oh my God, he is so cute – Christmas presents and we just, we're just gonna have a blast – [Lilly] Were his eyes always that nice? – Growing up so fast

– [Lilly] Has he been working out? Wait, wait, should I marry this guy? – Give me a kiss – [Lilly] Oh my God, he'd make such a good father Just look at him – Come on, give me a kiss Don't do that

– [Lilly] Wait, what's happening down there? – You're just so cute! – [Lilly] Oh my God, I bet you he could assemble IKEA furniture with his eyes closed – Uncle Dom loves you – [Lilly] (sighs) And then we could live on a farm and we could be known as that cool family that lives on a farm – Okay, I love you, sweetheart – And we'd only use organic baby food

(moans) This is everything I want Let's make a baby But, do not be confused, because this effect slash spell only lasts for about 60 minutes, okay? You better milk it for as long as you can – So, about that baby – Baby? Ew, what? Get away from me, don't touch me

– Yeah, I didn't wanna do that either – Tired Don't be trying to bring up no kids in no normal situation, okay? If the child is not present, no booty for you, okay, boy? Okay, honestly, and to answer your question, yes I would make out with you in front of the child if that's what you're thinking, okay? Don't judge me, okay? Kids need to learn about the human body at some age, okay? What better age than three? I talk so much crap I would never do that

I sound like a man, man, man, man, ma, hello, my name is Bob Number three, move that body, boy Can I just say that there is no greater turn-on than a man that can dance well? There is very few problems that that can't solve I can not believe you forgot our anniversary – Alright, well, I apologize, okay? Come on

– Okay, that's not gonna work again This is a different part of the video – (sighs) Fine (dance music) ♫ Is it too late now to say sorry? ♫ 'Cause I'm missing more than just your body ♫ Is it too late now to say sorry? ♫ Yeah, I know that I let you down

♫ Is it too late to say sorry now? ♫ I'm sorry, yeah ♫ I'm sorry, yeah ♫ Sorry ♫ – Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go get a tattoo of D-Trix on my bosom Number four, food

Now this could include bringing us food, making us food, ordering us food, whatever, as long as it involves you allowing food to enter my world Because honestly, it says a lot when a man understands his place in my life It goes food, Game of Thrones, him, slash all my friends that I complain to about him – Hey babe, I wanted to talk to you about something Oh, you're eating

You know what? It's okay, we can talk about it later – Thanks, babe – But, babe, did you want fries with that? (heartbeat) – Come here! No one has ever understood me like that – Yeah, and I can get you, like, ketchup and mayo on the side, 'cause it's your favorite, right? (light piano music) – It's overwhelming Marry me

– What? – (hoots) That might have been the sexiest scene I've ever included in a video Is it hot in here? Number five, thumbs And by that, I mean clicking the thumbs-up button What the hell were you thinking? Okay, to be fair, you liking this video might just be something that, like, I like, but like, yo, hey you, yo, how you doin', huh? Let's get to know each other And some other quick ones include not peeing on the toilet seat, being funny, playing the guitar, being David Beckham, wearing just a towel, driving a manual car, knowing how to properly hold a fork, knowing how to properly hold me, being WWE World Heavyweight Champion

♫ And these are a few of my favorite things ♫ But yo, this is just my opinion At the end of the day, straight up, don't change yourself for anyone, not even someone you're in a relationship with, because, can I just tell you? There's more than enough hours in the day and hot strangers on Instagram for us single people So, don't stress about it too much Hope you enjoyed that video with – D-Trix

– And we shot an awesome video on his channel The link is in the description Make sure you go check it out, give it a thumbs up, show it some love, because he is dope and awesome, so support this guy If you like this video, give it a thumbs up Make sure you comment below

If you wanna check out my last video, yo, it's right there You wanna check out my blog, is it right there Make sure you subscribe, because I make new videos every Monday and Thursday Wanna show 'em my outro? – Let's do it – [Lilly] Let's do it

One luh, – [Both] Superwoman, – That is a wrap, and zoop! You nailed that! – I know, I was a little early – [Lilly] Nailed, nailed! – I was a little early I'm sorry – I sound like I swallowed Caitlyn Jenner's sex change Like, I swallowed her sex change, like, what am I? Lilly or Louie? You decide

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